Category Archives: Clandestine Esoterical [sic.] Mysterious Universe

UK Crop Circles July 2016 [HJ]

13613363_10210118060608434_Barrows Green, near Widnes, Lancashire, 7 July 2016. Oats. Double ring with satellite circles. The Crop Circle Connector featured a rather comical “lights and strange noises the night it appeared” account, which is worth repeating (see below) and reads to me at least rather like a psedonymous report by its maker in an attempt to big it up (see The Field Guide by Rob Irving and John Lunberg, pages 206-209). Photo by “Steven Samosa”.

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West Kennett, Wiltshire, 8 July 2016. Wheat. A tiny and very retro formation right next to the long barrow, consisting of three circles joined by pathways. Photo by The Crop Circle Connector.

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Stonehenge, Wiltshire, 7 July 2016. Wheat. c.210′. Seven-pointed star and crescent, surrounded by ring. In the same field as, and exacty 20 years on from, the famed Stonehenge Julia Set. From looking at this latest effort, one might be forgiven for thinking “they don’t make crop circles like they used to”. Another formation teased by the Clandestine Esoterical [sic.] Mysterious Universe page, and thus killed stone dead before anybody had a chance to properly assess it. Which is perhaps just as well, since it is rather a wonky mess, the centre in particular. Photo by Steve Alexander.

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Stanton Bridge, Wiltshire, 8 July 2016. Wheat. c.80′. Ring with pathway leading to smaller circle, with pathway leading to fork. Small, wonky, amateur. Photo by The Crop Circle Connector.

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Twyford, Hampshire, 11 July 2016. Wheat. c.240′. A large single ring with much smaller, free-standing satellite circle. Very stylish and understated. Photo by Steve Alexander.

DSC4603-Wilton-Windmill-Wilts-15-07-2016-OHWilton, Wiltshire, 15 July 2016. Wheat. c.50′. A heart (or perhaps buttocks or cleavage….). Photo by Steve Alexander.

DSC4605-Hackpen-Hill-nr-Broad-Hinton-16-07-2016-OHHackpen Hill, Wiltshire, 16 July 2016. Wheat. c.150′. A unique and difficult to describe design, based upon three-and six-fold geometry. Photo by Steve Alexander.

DSC4633-Wessex-Ridgeway-Devizes-Wilts-16-07-2016-OHDevizes, Wiltshire, 16 July 2016. c.100′. Another of this season’s numerous simple rings and ringed circles. Barley. Photo by Steve Alexander.

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New Hall, near Sutton, Essex, 18 July 2016. Wheat. c.80′. More wonky crap in Essex. What on earth is going on in that place? Photo by Phantom 3 Quad-Copter.

DSC4647-Reigate-Hill-nr-Reigate-Surrey-19-07-2016-OHReigate Hill, Surrey, 19 July 2016. Wheat. c.140′. Grey with feathered ‘head-dress’. Photo by Steve Alexander.

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Burderop Down, Wiltshire, 21 July 2016. Wheat. c.120′. Central circle with five concentric rings, with characters scribed between the rings. Something of a haphazard mess. I note what look like the initials ‘DH’ – these are of course the initials of one particular circle maker but I hazard he’d hesitate to have his name attached to this cerealogical disaster. Photo by The Crop Circle Connector.

G0016087bbbSeven Acre Wood, near Newton St Loe, Somerset, 22 July 2016. Wheat. Back just before the turn of the century, Newton St Loe was something of a hot spot for crop circles. Sadly I cannot say that this latest effort is a return to past glories. Photo by The Crop Circle Connector.

G0035545bbbEast Field, Alton Barnes, Wiltshire, 22 July 2016. Wheat. c.150′ length. Unsurprisingly, given its location, this formation lasted barely a day before being cut by the farmer. Photo by The Crop Circle Connector.

DSC4763-Figsbury-Ring-Firsdown-Wilts-22-07-16-OHFigsbury Ring, Wiltshire, 22 July 2016. Wheat. c.220′. Another Clandestine Esoterical [sic.] Mysterious Universe circle, and probably their neatest of the season. I do not quite know why everybody described this circle as depicting a cat – albeit the face is rather cat-like – as to me it very clearly depicts a bat. Photo by Steve Alexander.

DSC4701-Ranscomb-Bottom-nr-Calstone-Wellington-Wilts-23-07-16-OHCallstone Wellington, Wiltshire, 25 July 2016. Wheat. c.280′. A beautiful play on pentagonal geometry, and perhaps the best – or at least the best-constructed – circle of the 2016 season. Photo by Steve Alexander.

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The Forests Way, near Roydon, Essex, 24 July 2016. Wheat. This formation occured in two stages (right section first). Photo by Prashant Trivedi.

DSC4805-Matterley-Basin-Winchester-25-07-2016-OHMatterley Basin, near Cheesefoot Head, Hampshire, 25 July 2016. Wheat. c.200′. It is good to see Hampshire ‘reactivated’ as a circles location again this season. Photo by Steve Alexander.

20160728westkennett-04West Kennett, Wiltshire, 28 July 2016. Wheat. c.150′. This was in the field to the northeast of the long barrow, a field which sees a circle most seasons. Unfortunately it was cut by the farmer the day it appeared, his having earlier chased a tour group out of it. Photo by Frank Laumen.

allcanningsaaa.fw_-1280x640All Cannings, Wiltshire, 28 July 2016. Wheat. This was defaced by the farmer before anybody could get photographs. I am not sure what it is supposed to represent. Photo by Gordon Burns.

DSC4780-Cley-Hill-Wilts-30-07-2016-OHCley Hill, near Warminster, Wiltshire, 30 July 2016. Wheat. c.150′. Another former circles ‘hot spot’ to be reactivated this season. Perhaps my personal favourite of the year. Note the standing centre. Cley Hill was a popular skywatching location back in the 1960s and 1970s, during the days of the Warminster “Thing”. Photo by Steve Alexander.

Hugh Janus

Staggering Hypocrisy # 4 [mc]

It’s not often that RACCF and Whack-A-Mole Williams and I agree on something, but it does happen. Clandestine Esoterical [sic.] Mysterious Universe and their practices are indeed preposterous, and pointless. What next? Circle makers engaging agents to negotiate rights to view their circles?

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So where does the “stagggering hypocrisy” come in? Because being informed about new circles by their maker, being first to photograph them and keen to be exclusive announcer of their presence, is exactly what RACCF and Williams and their Crop Circle Connector chums do. Don’t you like it when someone else plays your own game and cuts you out of the chain, guys?

Miles Challett

UK Crop Circles June 2016 [hj]

The first formation of June 2016 was a ‘stage two’ of a circle from May, in a big sloping barley field opposite Silbury Hill in Wiltshire, reported on 5 June (this and other photos in this article by Steve Alexander except where indicated).

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The same weekend saw two formations in the same corner of Wiltshire, near the town of Mere, both reported on 6 June. The first (and the first of the season in wheat) was a little scrappy though not without its supporters, in particular the Facebook page Clendestine Esoterical Mysterious Universe. This was the first of three circles this month to be announced to the world via this page and I wish they would not do it. As Miles Challett has explained in another post on this blog, it kills any mystery and ambiguity the circle might have had and in the process kills the circle itself. Whatever happened to circles just appearing in a field somewhere and waiting for someone to discover them?

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The second Mere circle was a much more pleasing affair, a play of five and ten fold geometry rendered very precisely in barley.

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This was followed by the second Clandestine Esoterical Mysterious Universe circle of the month, at Wylye, Wiltshire on 16 June (photo by Lucy Pringle). This was the first circle CEMU withheld the location to, giving clues as to its location and opening up a guessing game.

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The summer solstice always sees at least one circle. This year, rather than it being in the traditional seat of Wiltshire, it was the turn of Hampshire, more specifically a huge sloping wheat field opposite the Science Centre on Chilcomb Down. The delicate floral design was most pleasing.

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Things took a downturn, with the daft ‘sharks’ circle in wheat above Hackpen Hill on 23 June. Some people seemed to like this design. I am not one of them.

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Things swiftly improved however with this beautiful wheat design on Gander Down near Ovington, Hampshire on 24 June, which calls to mind the ‘time tunnel’ and ‘vortex’ designs of 2006. It is definitely my favourite circle of the year so far.

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This lovely floral design appeared at Popham, Hampshire, on 27 June in wheat.

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Unfortunately the month was to end on a sour note, with another ‘location withheld’ CEMU circle at White Sheet Hill, Wiltshire, on 29 June. At least this one was a lot more precisely constructed than their other efforts.

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This next circle appeared at Andover on 30 June (photo credit not known). Though it looks intriguing from this ground shot, aerials later revealed a horrendously wonky construction.

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I have also had reports of two other circles not mentioned above and which to my knowledge have not been photographed. First, at Winterbourne Whitechurch, near Blandford, Dorset. The farmer was apparently furious and cut the circle not long after it appeared. Second, at Eton Wick near Slough, Surrey. No further details. I will update this post in future if any additional information come to light.

A Beginner’s Guide To Circle Killing [mc]

Some of you will be aware of a new crop circle Facebook page, entitled Clandestine Esoterical [sic.] Mysterious Universe (and which came up in my post Staggering Hypocrisy # 2 – readers of that post will see that Matt Williams and I agree on something). Here’s CEMU’s most recent Facebook post:-

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This is the second time they’ve done this, post pictures of a circle with the location withheld, and hold competitions to guess the locations from cryptic clues. And the purpose of this exercise is what, exactly, gentlemen?

“We have been informed…” they say. No they haven’t. They made it. Make a circle, tease its location, turn it into a guessing game. What is the point of that? And with the game becoming the focus, the circle itself is relegated to an afterthought. Will anybody care about this circle by season’s end? Will it even be remembered?

Have you guys forgotten the essential tenets of circle making? As I’ve quoted elsewhere on this blog from ‘goatboy’ on the Crop Circle Connector forum, “Enter field. Make circle. Leave field. Shut the fuck up.” And that’s really all there is to it. Once you’ve made the circle you have to distance yourself from it totally, allow it to succeed or fail on its own merits. Teasers and guessing games do it no favours at all, and only draw attention to the fact that you made it.

No one cares about circles they know are, or which can be proven to be, man-made. People like mystery. People like circles that have mystery. It’s in that ambiguity, that space between, that circles thrive. At the end of the season, Clandestine Esoterical [sic.] Mysterious Universe’s circles will just be remembered as “that bunch of hoaxers who played games about the locations of their hoax circles”. No one will give a damn.

Miles Challett

Staggering Hypocrisy [mc]

One would think that after the smacking he receives every season (literally so last year) Matt Williams would have gotten the point by now, but every spring the guy pops back up like a whack-a-mole. Making the same arguments which have been proven to be bullshit, and utterly oblivious to the fact that much of the croppie scene considers him a bollocks-talking troublemaker who has brought nothing but destruction to a subject they hold dear.

He seems to have moved away from talk of any Wiltshire boycotts this time round – perhaps even he’s having difficulty putting a pro-Matt spin on the fact that every single UK circle so far this year has been in Wilts. He’s also shut up about Monique Klinkenbergh and the “circles being cut is all her fault” lie he’s been spouting for the last three years, having finally admitted late last season and by-the-by that it wasn’t true. Is he going to apologise to Monique? No. Why? Because – in his words – “she’s a cunt”.

So what’s got him in a lather now? Circles he considers wonky. Same old. Matt, no one cares. What’s more, you don’t care either.

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Why do I say that? Because, Matt, if you really cared, you’d have posted a similar YouTube video and RACCF criticism regarding that piece-of-crap bird circle from last July, instead of heaping praise upon it as you did (see my post Flippin’ The Bird). These circles get ripped apart for alleged imprecision, whereas your mates can bang out any old shite and get patted on the back for it. It’s got nothing to do with wonky circles. It’s because these two 2016 circles weren’t reported to you. Because you don’t know who made them. Because you imagine them the work of people you’ve fallen out with. Because, Matt, as ever you’re more transparent than a window.

Even the Connector can’t help themselves this time round, as exhibited by their latest and breathtakingly hypocritical post:

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I’m guessing the ‘RC’ initial here is Red Collie. It’d be too much to expect the Connector admins to actually put something together themselves instead of merely posting things other people send them. Collie, you do know that most of the other circles which the Connector gets the exclusive on are made by Matt’s mates and reported directly to him so he can photograph them, don’t you?

Miles Challett